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Facebook vs The Last Man Standing

Published June 15, 2010 - 4 Comments

As many of you know (and fewer even care), I officially became the last man on Earth to create a Facebook account.  For years I’ve ignored the fad, and opted to stick to my email and blog.  Sure, I adopted Twitter before probably anyone else reading this, but that was different.  (Oh yeah, don’t go by my AboutStephen account, because my defunct Dunnik account was much older.)  But Facebook?  Nah… just wasn’t for me.

But after years of listening to “Are you on Facebook?  You should get a Facebook account. All my pics are on Facebook. Come play Farmville on Facebook!” I’d had enough.  So I clicked my way through to that damn site, and you know what?

It’s worse than I thought.

I’m trying to turn off all the intrusive annoyances.  I can’t seem to scratch my ass without it notifying my friends.  I log in and see a panel of faces of people I MIGHT know, because they somehow crossed paths with someone else at some point.  I kept getting prompted to add things to my wall, when all I want to do it knock it down.  I can’t find anyone I search for, even when they tell me that they’re on Facebook.

“Your Facebook profile sucks.” I’ve been told more than one.

Yup.  It sure does.  I put a picture there to make it easier for people to find me, so they can then tell me that it sucks.

You’re welcome.